I've got a few random thoughts running through my head and I thought I would share them with ya'll.
I wonder if my daughter knows that I am not her personal "finder". Why is it whenever she loses something in the house, the first question she asks is "Mom have you seen my _______?" Most of the times my answer is I don't wear/use/need your _____ so why would I know where it is? But this morning I gave her one of special smart a$$ comments "What you mean it just grew legs and walked out of your room? Oh man... we have to alert the authorities.. call out the hounds.. alert the media.. THIS IS A TRAVESTY!! - Thanks for the applause next show at 7." I bet you she won't ask that question again...
Why did the man for my appointment show up early to my house yesterday and give my daughter a compliment like "You've got a good girl there.. she wouldn't open the door even after she contacted you on the phone" My response (remember I have plenty common sense) "What else was she supposed to do? Open the door to a complete stranger because you said my name?" You big dumb bunny!
Why do people think because you are unsuccessful at your marriage that gays and lesbians can't be? What is it with this "tolerance" bs? I believe they should be able to be just as miserable as the next mofo.. Everyday there's a new ad here in Cali as to whether or not gay marriage should be overturned by the voters.. I don't believe in discrimination but I do believe in equal opportunity miserableness (yeah I just made that word up)
Why do people speed up just to get in front of you then slow down? I mean what was the point? You could have gotten your turtle driving behind - behind me! I mean did you just get a new rear bumper sticker or something?
And for the love of Sweet Minty Jesus why would you want to follow behind someone so close that you are practically sitting in their backseat? I mean since when were you ever able to "make" someone drive? Hell if you that late - your butt should have left YESTERDAY.. you'd be on time today!
I'm so glad I don't have to get on the freeway anymore to travel to work.. I swear that mess thur.. it'll make you smoke every morning on que! Time to go to work? Got keys - check! Got briefcase - check! Got blunt - check! We're ready for the morning traffic...
I swear children nowadays kill me.. just yesterday I saw a child cross my path with 4 different shades of Rainbow brite colored yarn in her hair.. she better be glad I couldn't get to my camera phone quick enough - because I'd have to put her on blast about that Homey D Clown hairdo. I just didn't want to whoop her fast tailed behind for this coifed tragedy.. but I wanted to find her mother who allowed this mess.. how in the hell do you just let your daughter walk out the house looking like she's ready to join Barnum & Bailey?? I know I'd never pay to have something like that done to my child's head.. *smh*
Tis all the randomness for now!
My Friends Are Authors And You Should Buy Their Books - I love when I have people around me that are brave enough and diligent enough to do something that I want to do but haven't dedicated myself enough to make...
1 month ago